Never. Ever.
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PhDarlingNothing screams, "I spent two years earning my masters, then four years in a PhD program, wherein I completed a doctoral dissertation about the incremental construction of surface light fields," like this silky cap and gown that barely grazes the bottom of my butt cheeks. Maybe next time I'll just go for my associate's degree in "Forgetting to Put on Pants."
Available at Buy Costumes for $19.99
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Sexy ChuckyI remember watching Chucky when I was a wee tot and being frightened out of my ever-loving mind. But even scarier than "Child's Play" is the fact that someone would be willing to pay $40 to be a sexed-up version of a voodoo demon doll. Seriously, if I needed an excuse to dress up like a sociopathic redhead, I'd lose the axe, add some vodka, and just be Lindsay Lohan.
Available at Buy Costumes for $39.99
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Sexy Brian from "Family Guy"Let's say, theoretically, I wanted to dress up as Brian from "Family Guy" for Halloween. My first costuming instinct would probably be a fuzzy dog suit with elastic ears and a nose to match. Do you know what my very last instinct would be? A micro-mini and go-go boots. On the plus side, the dress has Brian's picture emblazoned on it, 'cause clearly no one is going to figure this one out on their own.
Available at Buy Costumes for $54.99
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Elmo Sassy Female Adult CostumeCall me a killjoy, but I'm pretty sure the only reason there is a "sassy adult" version of an Elmo costume is because some fetishist wanted an excuse to say "Tickle me" all night. 'Cause clearly, this costume has no business being anywhere near kids. That decapitated Elmo head being used as a jaunty hat is enough to scar children for life and desecrate childhoods everywhere.
Available at Buy Costumes for $59.99
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Naughty Nem-OhHey look! I found Nemo! No, wait, wait, I found a shimmery spandex orange and white leotard, matching legwarmers, a tiny black tutu, and four inch heels. You can understand my confusion though. Just call me Dory.
Available at Buy Costumes for $58.99
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Crayola Tickle Me Pink Tank DressColor me cynical. First of all, the proportions of this crayon are all off: The sheath of the dress would have to be twice as long in order to mimic the ratio of an unused crayon, and the outfit's stretch against her curves make it look like the wax melted in a child's sweaty palm. Second of all, no woman would be caught dead in that parking cone hat. I mean, c'mon now.
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Looking for a Halloween costume you would wear? AOL Shopping has the dish on what's hot this year. There's not a Sexy Chucky costume in sight. Go figure. Or check out our craftier DIY costume ideas or these ideas from Etsy. And don't forget to plan your Halloween party with ideas and games from Celebrations.com.
And let us know what you think of these costumes on our Facebook page.
jerri,10-10-2010, 8:59PM
Why does she have to be a fat ugly b!+ch? And why all the hatred toward someone you don't even know? Sounds like someone's spending a LITTLE too much time in front of his computer. If I wanted to jump to conclusions like you, I might deduce that *you* are the fat ugly one.
Jessica,10-10-2010, 8:46PM
these aren't as bad as most costumes. these are actually pretty tame compared to the slutty costumes i saw while out shopping for my costume. i don't understand why all costumes have to be so skanky.
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jon,10-12-2010, 3:12PM
halloween is so all the woman can dress like the sluts & ho's they wanna be without n e 1 sayin chit to them..lmao
David,10-10-2010, 11:44PM
Actually, Jessica, since I am Jewish, I can pretty much tell you that Judaism is no more a race than any other religions. Just as there are Black Christians and White Christians and Asian Christians, there are Black Jews and White Jewish and Latino Jews. All someone has to do to become Jewish is either have a Jewish mother or convert into the religion just as one would convert into Christianity or Islam. Judaism does have a shared history, of course, but it is not based on race, but on a belief system. Hope this helps...
Tins,10-11-2010, 11:33AM
Google "save creatively" for something even better then a few risky costumes!
democrats r stupid,10-10-2010, 8:38PM
wake up fools, hooloween costumes should be home brewed, unless of course the liberals have you indoctronated
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Pagan Mom,10-10-2010, 9:16PM
You don't have much room to call anyone else stupid, when you can't spell Halloween or indoctinated.
musiclover1267,10-22-2010, 1:55AM
What do halloween costumes have to do with politics?
Oh, I know!
Nothing.
Winner...
tiphaniemarie07,10-10-2010, 8:21PM
OMG the person/s that did the commentaries is/are hillarious..I literally lol'd. But soo true what he or she said about the costumes : - /
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teltech543,10-11-2010, 6:17PM
All of those costumes are hot. Must be a fat chick who wrote the article about not wearing any of them.
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Jim,10-10-2010, 8:26PM
Hey Zippy shut yo lippy and you won't be to fat for these
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Antoine Figgis,10-10-2010, 8:28PM
sounds like you're somebody that doesn't know how to correctly pronounce/write 'bar mitzvah'. i believe in the jewish religion that type of person might be referred to as a "putz".
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Beez,10-10-2010, 8:30PM
Hey, there. Get a spellchecker!!!!
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Derek,10-10-2010, 8:34PM
You're an uneducated moron who cannot even spell and a racist.
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ed,10-10-2010, 8:38PM
You (the writer) wouldn't wear these more than likely because you don't have the body to wear them or you are a total prude. Halloween is meant to be fun, get a life!!
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sam,10-10-2010, 8:52PM
halloween is meant to be fun, not for women to run around dressed as themed whores.
emma,10-10-2010, 9:19PM
halloween is meant to be fun for kids. im with sam.
Paul,10-10-2010, 9:21PM
Sam, there is a difference between sexy and whore. The costumes are sexy and as far as these ladies being whores well how the he** am I suppose to know if they are or not, come to think about it how the he** do you know if there whores or not have you meet them before. Look, just stfu and quit judging a book by its cover.
...,10-10-2010, 9:24PM
Okay guys, calm down. I don't think this is meant to be a bash against sexy costumes. I think it's more saying that these particular ideas are ridiculous. Which, by the way, they are. Trust me, I'm all for a sexy costume, but these are a bit weird.
Kelly,10-10-2010, 8:48PM
I have always had to buy or make my costumes. However, the "sexy" version of whatever has become all the rage and I didn't realize it until I dressed as a cow one year and it was NOT sexy! Just funny. I always thought you shouldn't look anything like yourself when in costume & I never thought of being a sexy version of an unsexy character or animal. I found myself among all of these "sexy" costumes and of course no attention was paid to me as a fat holstein cow with huge udders. Last year I was the "sexy" cowardly lion with a group of friends who rocked the other Wizard of Oz characters. Another year I was Wonder Woman and my guy was Thor. This year I was asked to be a sexy white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland with a group of friends going as the other main characters. I'm using most of my own clothes & just bought a hat and rabbit ears & tail. Adding white fuzzy matterial to put over my boots. It is what it is, I guess, just a sexy Halloween fad? I agree there ARE some weird costumes out there!
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