That's never a good thing.
Fortunately, costumes gone wrong are a gold mine of comedy. Here are five of our favorite mystery costumes, with imaginary narratives about how exactly they came to be. Because who knows what these people were really thinking?
Mystery Costumes
In "The Feminine Mystique," Betty Friedan asserts that the typical mid-'50s housewife lived a dehumanized life. In fact, in chapter 16, she discusses the effects of extreme dehumanization wherein housewives' heads would actually evolve into Godzilla heads! Okay, that's a lie. But it's a good story, and an even better costume.
I can't tell if Jason Voorhees is dressed up as a taco, or if a taco is dressed up as Jason Voorhees. I'm also not entirely sure why he's holding a microphone instead of a chain saw (perhaps he now plans on killing… at karaoke?!). Regardless, this is
shaping up to be the best "Friday the 13th" sequel yet!
The annual grocery pageant may be grueling, but Ruth had what it took. She placed first in the formal bag-wear walk; she dominated in the bag-kini round; she aced the all-important interview question, "Paper or plastic?" And all her hard work paid off: Ruth is now Miss Grocery 2010, representing Stop'n'Shops all across America.
Man: I'd like my Halloween costume to be high-minded.
Woman: How about covering yourself in panels of orange vinyl a la Christo and Jeanne-Claude's famed NYC art installation "The Gates"?
Man: But I also want it to be sexy.
Woman: Then don't wear any pants.
Man: Sold!
Scuba mask? Shower curtain? Drain hardware? Bubble wrap? Antenna? This is starting to look less like a Halloween costume and more like an innovative showering experiment that's gone horribly, horribly wrong.
Andi,10-28-2010, 3:12PM
number 3 is The Paper bag Princess! It's a children's book. I loved it when I was a little girl.
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Elle,10-28-2010, 4:05PM
Yay! I'm so glad other people recognized that Paper Bag Princess! What a great costume - I wish I had thought of it. I guess whoever wrote this article is "a bum"!
Mary,10-28-2010, 5:11PM
I agree, I knew this one right away. It was a fantastic idea and it makes me want to scream 'Hey Dragon, wake up!'
Alice Coleman,10-28-2010, 3:26PM
Seconding the fact that 3 is the Paper Bag Princess. Way to show no understanding of young feminist literature.
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MartyDOM,10-28-2010, 7:53PM
lol im a guy and i remember reading that book in elementary school!
Bob,10-28-2010, 3:28PM
It's what's her name from the "View", Joan something?
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mike,10-28-2010, 3:52PM
A third for The Paperbag Princess. I recognized her right away, and am glad to see others know it too. My daughter loved that book when we read it some 20 years ago...
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izzy,10-28-2010, 4:07PM
i knew it was the paper bag princess right away! i loved that book as a child! my mom used to read it to me all the time! i still have the book to this day
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Bobby,10-28-2010, 4:13PM
I immediately though of Dead Rising 2 with the first picture. Too much gaming for me I guess!
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Rick,10-28-2010, 4:51PM
Either the Godzilla-head model is the hairiest, flattest-chested, beer-bellied woman I've ever seen, or that is a guy wearing a dress and apron. Oh, and Godzilla head.
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Ray,10-28-2010, 5:02PM
I can't go out for halloween anymore. I got arrested last year for open lewdness. I went out as a pull toy.
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rotten rollin,10-28-2010, 5:14PM
The Godzilla costume reminds me of Joy Behar, that foul-mouthed liberal woman on TV.
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Dave Mayo,10-28-2010, 5:19PM
I have been a mobile disc jocky since 1962 and I have played at many Halloween parties. I make my own outrageous costumes. They win prizes and people ask to borrow them and they win prizes.
At my day job as a paralegal I could have wore a black suit and got a breif case and told everyone I was a lawyer, but I wore a head and hands of a reptile and the tail of a skunk. What are you supposed to be? A Lizardgator. No I did not get fired. The Head attorney loved it and gave me first prize.
My Purple People Eater costume NEVER gets a "What are you supposed to be?. They start singing when they see me comming. "One long horn and one big eye, looks like a Purple People Eater to me. (from the hit record that comes back and lands on earth every Halloween since Sheb Wolley introduced it in 1958.
Life is fun when you do not act the age you are supposed to be.
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OB,10-28-2010, 5:24PM
I got cookie monster off the first one....maybe I am just too hungry
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Matt,10-28-2010, 5:26PM
I'm not totally sure but #5 looks somewhat similar to the final boss from Chrono Trigger named Lavos.
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Kat,10-28-2010, 8:47PM
Lavos? I knew it looked familiar from somewhere. Here I was thinking it was an alien from the original Doctor Who...
will,10-28-2010, 6:48PM
Is number 1 Gayzilla?
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noneedno,10-28-2010, 6:58PM
isn't number 5 those ET guys. (scientists not alien)
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Lisa,10-28-2010, 6:59PM
Paper Bag Princess? I thought she was a "Bag Queen." You know...instead of Drag Queen?
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Katie,10-28-2010, 7:09PM
Geez, I dressed up all in black then hung a super sized postage stamp around my neck.....
What was I????????????????????
Wait for it.....
Wait for it.........
I was BLACK MAIL!
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